Babblings on a dreary Sunday evening.

While concealing in the shadows of your bedroom after school comes to an end sounds like a good idea, I can ensure you it is not. Having disrupted a routine acquired over 14 years of schooling, many find it hard to adjust to a new pattern, much like myself. We have it ingrained into our minds from early on that we must follow a system; birth, childhood, school, adulthood, work, death. Many prefer not to talk about the latter as if it were irrelevant. What I can't seem to apprehend is the fact that after so many years of schooling nothing will come of it. Surely I will get a 'higher education' somewhere along the line, but that only accounts for some of the knowledge that I have come to understand. I don't understand why there must be so much pressure put on todays generation and the generations to come to live up to there predecessors. I want to discover the things I want to know about, not things someone thinks I should know about. To live life how I want to, but because of todays society nothing comes without a price anymore, so to do just some of the things I want to are impossible. So I sit in my room to my chagrin, wondering how it ever came to the point in my life where I stopped looking at reality and delved into a different place of being.

Drawing makes me happy

This is a portrait done entirely in charcoal and white pastel. Its is of the lovely Z. You can find them on through the link tentaclesandteacups. I have to keep practicing on portraits of people since I haven't been doing any lately. So this is number one.

yatta yatta

Gave in and started writing again. Mainly I write just personal stuff, the things that I'm uncomfortable writing online about with nosy prying eyes. I find its so relieving to be able to vent to something without anyone actually knowing. I like the secrecy, the mysterious of writing something no body will ever see until someone stumbles upon it, or you stumblr upon it yourself. Somewhat like a time capsule in a way. Expressing more about a moment that any photograph ever could.

Appart from that I'm going more in depth with trying to get myself to learn French and Japanese. I found some really helpful books that I will buy once I come upon some money, I don't see myself undertaking any courses though, I think it will just aggravate me and make me emotional. I like learning on my own, its the only method that I can actually learn.

I have some pictures to upload on here soon...

Making things

I was watching Lord Of The Rings with my sister and I guess this kind of inspired this. I have wished ever since I was little that I could be a elf  (Plan to get my ears pointed in the future) . This is basically a prototype that I made in 10 mins out of thing aluminum sheeting. Cut out the pattern that I wanted and scratched in veins for the leaf before molding it into shape. Turned out pretty well. Can't wait to make more of these babies!!

Portfolio

Some artworks I have chosen for my portfolio. I have two interviews at different Universities in 3 weeks, may as well get stuff ready before then.

Shaved my Head

Went all out and shaved the bottom part of my head. My head hasn't been like this since I was two and lost all of my hair and it feels really funky. So happy I did it though. I finally feel like I can start to express myself how I want to now that school is over and done with. 

Will be doing some other things once I get some money, maybe I'll colour it, but I don't know if I want to go black or a lighter colour like an ash blonde.  I think exploration with different hairstyles is a great way of gaining self confidence, do what you like and what makes you feel good and don't think back.

Hair!!

Thinking about something new to do with my hair, I'm getting a bit bored with how it currently looks, but I don't want it to be cut any shorter than it is now ( about 15 cm past my shoulders). I was thinking of maybe shaving the underside of my hair a bit. So that my hair is a lot lighter, thinner and looks different to anything I have had before.

Considering going back to black, hair colour wise. I mean I would love to put some fluorescent yellow in my hair but I am currently looking for work so black it is. Anyway I'll probably be doing this tomorrow after I go out to the mall to hand in my resumé to every possible place.

Formal

So my school formal was held well over a month ago. It was great, the food was nice, the music choices from the DJ were debatable and the after party was somewhat of a disappointment.  

Catch up

Things that have been happening the past few months:

• I went to more parties/outings than I have ever been to from the ages 12-16, which is kinda lame, but hey at least its a start and I don't feel as much as a social oddity anymore.
• I graduated from highschool.
• I'm almost finished my HSC exams.
• I finished my major work in art (I'll post pictures once its returned to me from marking)
• I dyed my hair back to brown/black.
• I had my formal.
• I stopped trying to please everyone by acting differently.
• I gained like 10 kilos from stressing out about school.
• I started working out to lose those 10 kilos.
• I applied for University
• Got my first car.
• and a heap of other somewhat boring stuff but eh.

So that what's been happening to summarise.

Im back...Sorta

I can't remember the last time I made a post here. I have now graduated from High school and am currently doing my HSC exams. I have two more left to go: Chemistry and Visual Arts. I'm currently looking for work and will be able to have more time to make posts on this blog again. YAY