Monday, April 16, 2012

...

I've pretty much abandoned this blog in the last few days, but I have been held up by a few things. I kind of put myself in isolation and haven't retreated from my room at all apart form heading to Parramatta formal dress shopping. I've actually lost a few kilos too, kind of worrying, but I'm in one of my moods where I want to be locked away with my books and seep into a reality that I can never imaging possibly ever having. Somewhere I wont have to be perpetually reminded of life and all its 'responsibilities' that I undoubtedly have no control. Is it really that hard to just live and not face the fact that we are all driven by each others masks and disguises of what living is, constantly feeding ourselves that our lives are without. Without what? Without the luxuries we so longingly 'need'? Without hate and bitterness that we claim we don't need, but couldn't survive without. Companionship and love? Stories and mysteries? Work and slavery? Even in writing this I'm contradicting the very thought, I too divulge in what has been driven in by forces we'd never be able to explain. Gosh I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore, I'm tired and probably should be asleep right about now.

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